Whoopi Goldberg, Mel Gibson defender and America's foremost differentiator between "rape" and "rape-rape," sees no problem with yesterday's racist "watermelon toothpaste" cartoon in the Boston Herald. After all, she uses watermelon toothpaste!

In honor of Presidents Day, President Barack Obama is celebrating the holiday by sitting at home and watching his favorite television shows. The only difference between Obama and a normal person is that Obama is probably sitting at home watching advance episodes of Game of Thrones while you're stuck watching the season 3 trailer over and over.

He may be the leader of the free world, but Barack Obama knows he's not the one who knocks; none of Matt Lauer's friends showed up for his birthday party; Peter Jackson probably would show up to Stephen Colbert's birthday party; and The Boss is not happy at all.

Though rumors are constantly being thrown around of a Friends reunion, and then constantly being shot down by Pheebs, who is too busy playing air piano with Mike, she'd probably be singing a different Smelly Cat-esque tune if she knew that Friends creator Marta Kauffman might be able to stunt cast President Obama after a November 26th fundraising dinner Kauffman is hosting.

No one—not even Barack and Michelle—are safe from Amanda Bynes and her "ugly" grenades.