Fully-grown human Bill Simmons has the fervency of a small child when he really, really wants something (see: his impassioned pleas back in 2009 to become the general manager of the Timberwolves; see also: the Timberwolves bad cop refusal to indulge this). Good cop Disney has now given in to their adorable son's relentless demands, and made him producer on a Deadspin commenter's upcoming movie.