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While the rest of the media zigs under a rock to avoid FCC censure in the wake of the Premeditatedly-Exposed Titty That Ate The World, HBO zagged and crammed at least 63 permutations of the "f-word" [Ed. note—"Fuck"] into last night's episode of Deadwood, according to Ann Oldenburg of USA Today. She fails to tally the instances of "cocksucker" in the Western's dialogue; our unofficial count came to "Jesus, they swear a lot on this show." We're going to assume that while Oldenburg could demurely refer to the "f-word" [Ed. note—"Fuck"] in her article, it would have been a little harder to work in a reference to the more obscure label "CS-word" or the phonetically-minded "See-Esser."

In a related story, Slate's Mob Experts engage in a little hand-wringing about the existence of gay mobsters, as last night's Soprano's episode featured wiseguy Vito Spatafore getting caught with a mouthful of a male security guard's capicola. We're absolutely, positively going to refrain from the easy Gay Mafia joke.

UPDATE: USA Today seems to have missed four f-bombs. We just ran across this great site, which we're going to take as the Bible on Deadwood swearing. Come on, they calculated the fucks per minute (FPM)! Which, if you were wondering, came out to 1.34 on Sunday.