Hello, Dolls! It’s great to see you all again. I hope you’ve had a restful few weeks between Keeping Up With the Kardashians seasons, and you’ve properly mourned the loss of KUWTK’s old, tired, and clunky graphics. That’s right, ain’t no old graphics, bih, we got new graphics and opening sequences, bihhhhh! Things are rapidly changing in the Kardashian/Jenner household, so we’re thankful that we have a safe space in which we can keep up. Speaking of keeping up, let’s dive right in to this lightly packed premiere and uncover when and why we were lied to by Calabasas’ first family. Come here, hold my hand, and let’s go dolls.

When exactly did Scott Disick cheat on Kourtney? Kris Jenner is on a yacht, but where, when, and with whom? Every week, keen-eyed Kardashians scholar Mariah Smith uses paparazzi photos, gossip-blog coverage, the family’s own Instagram and Twitter accounts, and common sense, to investigate, and establish a detailed and accurate shooting schedule ofKeeping Up With the Kardashians—laying bare the distorted timelines and manufactured plotline of America’s royal family. Welcome to Keeping Up With the Kontinuity Errors.

Hell hath no fury like a woman forced to film multiple enraged scenes about how her former husband who is now a woman named Caitlyn badmouthed her to Vanity Fair well over a month after the article in question is released. Kris Jenner’s fury is impressive, but especially when you consider that these scenes filmed well over a month after Caitlyn Jenner cast her as Satan’s bride.

This week in Jerusalem! Armenia wasn’t always easy, but then, the best things in life never are. This week, we follow a grinning and drenched Kanye West out of the Kardashians’ homeland and into the holy land, where Bubba is baptized and cookies are still Armenian.

This Sunday, Keeping Up With the Kardashians returned to E! for its 11th season. Today, keen-eyed Kardashians scholar Mariah Smith returns to Gawker for her second season. Every week, Smith uses paparazzi photos, gossip-blog coverage, the family’s own Instagram and Twitter accounts, and common sense, to investigate, and establish a detailed and accurate shooting schedule of Keeping Up With the Kardashians—laying bare the distorted timelines and manufactured plotline of America’s royal family. Welcome back for another season of Keeping Up With the Kontinuity Errors.

If recent months have taught us anything, it’s that the Kardashians—a family whose daily comings and goings are documented more thoroughly than the Obamas’—are able to conceal secrets more securely than the most secret shadow branches of the C.I.A., until such time as TV ratings require their reveal. This week, the world learned that Kim Kardashian was pregnant. But when did Kim Kardashian learn that?

In a conversation on Sunday night’s episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians, eldest sister Kourtney brought up her stepfather Bruce Jenner’s announcement that he is transgender and planning to transition. A totally normal topic, given that she ostensibly just learned about this in last week’s episode—except the conversation broadcast on Sunday was actually filmed last November, while Jenner’s announcement to his stepdaughters was filmed two months later, in January.

In the wake of Bruce Jenner’s Diane Sawyer interview, rumors have swirled regarding the alleged re-shooting of tearful Kris Jenner scenes for E!’s Keeping Up With The Kardashians: About Bruce two-part special. In light of this controversy, Gawker called on an expert to determine exactly when the footage was filmed.