Chet Haze, who is currently on vacation in New York City but unwilling to meet up with me, was dining at a restaurant with mama Rita Wilson and papa Tom Hanks on Thursday evening, when yet another strained conversation about his future was derailed by the rap world: Diddy reportedly sent a round of tequila shots to the whole fam. Yung Hanx has been sober for over three months.

Have you spent a decade carrying umbrellas and argyle socks on you at all times, just in case Diddy needs a new valet? Missed your chance to star on I Want To Work For Diddy? Fear no more, Diddy just issued this ridiculous casting call for on-air talent for his latest venture, Revolt TV.