If recent months have taught us anything, it’s that the Kardashians—a family whose daily comings and goings are documented more thoroughly than the Obamas’—are able to conceal secrets more securely than the most secret shadow branches of the C.I.A., until such time as TV ratings require their reveal. This week, the world learned that Kim Kardashian was pregnant. But when did Kim Kardashian learn that?

It’s the word on the lips of literally every single American, from the newest baby, to the most recently deceased corpse: dadbod. A guy with a gut. A man with flab to grab. According to the original dadbod text, this soft body type is “more human, natural, and attractive” than its perfectly sculpted counterpart. But do people outside of trend stories actually find dadbod hotter?

Last night, E! released a teaser for an upcoming Keeping Up With the Kardashians episode where 17-year-old Kylie Jenner reveals she’s had lip injections. Anyone who’s seen a photo of Kylie in the last year could have told you that, but the Kardashians have gone to great lengths to keep it just another sweet family secret.

One day it will all be over for Terrence Howard. Life, yes, but more importantly the extremely embarrassing legal battle he’s been waging with his ex-wife Michelle Ghent. Recently, according to TMZ, Howard filed legal documents stating that Ghent attempted to blackmail him by threatening to release photos of his small d:

Last week, former rock band frontman and current yogurt salesman “Uncle” Jesse Katsopolis fired off an irate tweet about his adopted niece, the actress and fashion designer Michelle Tanner. While Uncle Jesse raised Michelle from infancy alongside her father, Danny, and a host of tenuously- or unrelated children and adults in a free-love style commune run out of a four-story San Francisco residence, his recent remarks could, at best, be deemed “uncharitable.”