Some people need money; Some people have money; Some people use a $4500 Lanvin coat as a napkin for their baby at the movies—a Norman Rockwell tableau.

Did you know that right now, in 2015, if you have enough money, you can choose whether you have a boy child or a girl child? It’s true, apparently, and Kanye Kardashian and Kim West reportedly did it to ensure their new baby is a boy.

Kim Kardashian announced via Instagram yesterday that she and her husband Kanye West are adding a boy emoji to complete their perfect Unicode family.

Apparently Kanye West has a new project with Kim Kardashian dropping in the next nine months—lets just hope their second baby turns out better than Yeezus.

Kanye West: he’s always talking about something, but what? If you’re not sure, maybe you should ask Kim Kardashian. Last night, Access Hollywood’s Billy Bush asked Kim whether or not she’s a fan of her husband’s famous “rants,” and if she, you know, gets them. Kim explained:

[Note: Some of the photos below are NSFW]: When you are Kim Kardashian, every year—1998, 2012, 40 A.D., the future—is a good year for you. Looking out over the hills of Calabasas or the boulevards of Paris, your kingdoms, both, you can feel proud of all you have wrought. Fame for you has expanded like a waist freed from a waist trainer, and in 2015, your notoriety continues to grow.

"Shoes."

Look at this shit. North West clutching a Frozen suitcase so that she could be dragged through the airport by an anonymous, bald, burly security guard. Her boots gliding across the floor like roller skates. Tiny, custom-made YEEZUS tour jacket her royal robe. What a life!

Kanye West performed a new song called "All Day" at the BRIT Awards (don't ask!) today, but it wasn't even the most important debut of the night. No, that came from Taylor Swift, who revealed two new instant classic award show memes: Taylor Swift Slackjawed During Kanye West Performance and Taylor Swift Dancing Stupidly During Kanye West Performance.

Kanye West is over in the UK today for the BRIT Awards, which is like the Grammys but somehow more meaningless. In London he stopped at a Nando's, which is like Boston Market but somehow more meaningful, and reportedly decided to try and eat lunch in peace by telling the assembled crowd, "Whoever wants a motherfucking picture, let's just do it now." They obliged by turning their backs to him and taking a bunch of selfies.

After trouncing Khloe Kardashian in this week's Twitter feud for the ages, Amber Rose has won again: this time by clapping back at Kanye West, who said on the radio this morning that he had to take "30 showers" after dating her to get with his current wife, Kim Kardashian.

In an interview on Power 105.1's "The Breakfast Club" taped yesterday and aired this morning, Kanye West revealed that he had to take "30 showers" after dating Amber Rose to get with his current wife, Kim Kardashian. He also suggested that 25-year-old rapper Tyga is dating his 17-year-old sister-in-law Kylie Jenner. Oh, Kanye!

Would you take your baby to a fashion show? You probably wouldn't. What baby could enjoy a fashion show, and what person could enjoy a fashion show while tending to a baby? Of course, Kanye West and Kim Kardashian are not normal people, and their daughter North West is not a normal baby. And so it was with North's legendary Fashion Week: A constant nightmare punctuated by writhing, screaming, wailing, and resting "Can I live?" face.

There are three things Man knows to be true about the world:

Beck, pretty much the most agreeable guy in the world and winner of this year's Grammy for Album of the Year, was "excited" when Kanye West joined him onstage last night, also thought that Beyoncé was going to win, and says he still loves Kanye regardless of his repeated slights.

The same move that caused America to shun Kanye West in 2009 earned him a spot in the nation's good graces forever in 2015.

Kim Kardashian, just a butt, will be taking her spring break in her ancestral Armenia this year. Butt she wants to make one thing clear: though she will be there on the 100th anniversary of the Armenian genocide, she is NOT visiting to honor the 100th anniversary of the Armenian genocide.

Kanye West loves Will Ferrell. The rapper has sampled the comedian, cameoed in his films and played him unreleased music. In a new interview in GQ, West even cites as a spiritual guide—alongside God—a Ferrell film, repeating a line from Step Brothers to illustrate why he decided to marry Kim Kardashian: "Never lose your dinosaur."