In a recent interview with People.com’s Moms&Babies section, Kristin Cavallari revealed much about her home life with Jay Cutler and her two sons, Camden and Jaxon. For one thing, Camden said the F-word once. For another, dinner time is 5:45 p.m.

One of the fabulous things about being a celebrity is people will listen to you talk about anything you want to talk about—even if you straight up admit you have no idea what it is you’re talking about.

Sixty years ago, actor/singer/heartthrob Tab Hunter was outed. The story goes that in 1955, Hunter’s first agent Henry Willson sold Hunter out to gossip rag Confidential so that the magazine wouldn’t publish a piece outing another client of Willson’s, Rock Hudson. Despite being something that at the time was virtually inconceivable—especially for all-American boys—Hunter’s career thrived.

Well, this is rich. Liam Payne, bête noire of One Direction—a heaven-sent pop troupe which descended into hell upon the coward Zayn’s departure, now seated at the left hand of the devil to hold concert only when he demands—says One Direction was never Zayn’s “bag.” Yeah right!

Hayden Panettiere—an actress currently portraying a character suffering from postpartum depression on the ABC show Nashville—has reportedly checked into a rehab center citing postpartum depression.

Over the weekend, new Daily Show host Trevor Noah performed a short standup set at a convention in Los Angeles called Politicon. There, he did a bit about the varying extremes of racism he has experienced across America, which was insightful, but also a nearly exact replica of a decades-old Dave Chappelle joke.

A message from Kristin Cavallari, via the Official Kristin Cavallari App for iPhone and Android: “You’ve been throwing out the healthiest part of avocados this entire time.”

Johnny Depp is a man who has never won an Academy Award, but lest you think he cares, check yourself real quick! Because he doesn’t care and quite frankly, it would be a burden to him, so don’t even worry about Johnny, okay?

Under a waning moon, a glowing witch—poreless, bathed in serums—sets a single silver coin beneath a glittering skull candelabra. “She’s a movie actress,” she chants, eyes closed, her intention set. “She’s a movie actress; she’s a movie actress; she’s a movie actress.”

The Chicago Bears, led by Kristin Cavallari’s husband Jay Cutler, won their game against the Kansas City Chiefs yesterday. Kristin’s response:

When exactly did Scott Disick cheat on Kourtney? Kris Jenner is on a yacht, but where, when, and with whom? Every week, keen-eyed Kardashians scholar Mariah Smith uses paparazzi photos, gossip-blog coverage, the family’s own Instagram and Twitter accounts, and common sense, to investigate, and establish a detailed and accurate shooting schedule ofKeeping Up With the Kardashians—laying bare the distorted timelines and manufactured plotline of America’s royal family. Welcome to Keeping Up With the Kontinuity Errors.

Rumer Willis, the actress child of Bruce Willis and Demi Moore, and Chris Soules, the guy who used to be The Bachelor, were “spotted” together last week sitting courtside at a Knicks game. Then they were “spotted” again at the popular night club Lavo. Rumer would like you to know, however, that they are not dating, and there is no story here, oh my God.

As a result of shared physical and emotional attraction, Calvin Harris, Scottish DJ, (not pictured), and Taylor Swift have been involved in a romantic relationship since early summer. Harris’s recent, relaxing trip to a Thai massage parlor may have changed that, however.

Anne Hathaway is very particular about her eggs and honestly I don’t blame her.

At the beginning of football season, Kristin Cavallari promised to post a new “tailgating recipe” on the Official Kristin Cavallari App for iPhone and Android each week for a month. Her wild scam ends today.

Here’s a photo of Kristin Cavallari debuting the cover of her forthcoming book, Balancing in Heels, at an event for her shoe line at New York Fashion Week last month:

Kim Kardashian currently stars on the reality show Keeping Up With the Kardashians. Kristin Cavallari used to star on the reality show The Hills. You might think the similarities between the two end there, but you’re wrong, because Kristin and Kim Kardashian also dress alike, because Kristin copies Kim Kardashian. (Busted!!!!!)

Superficially, Todd Strauss-Schulson’s The Final Girls looks like what would happen if Friday the 13th got the Wes Craven’s New Nightmare treatment: It’s a self-referential exploration of tropes (it takes its title from scholar Carol J. Clover’s brilliant analysis of horror cinema), a genre-excavation using a movie-within-a-movie conceit. (Note that the film-within-the-film is not Friday the 13th exactly, but the very similar fictional ‘80s horror hack-’em-up Camp Bloodbath). The action follows Max (Taissa Farmiga) and some of her friends, who get sucked into the slasher flick Max’s mom Amanda (played by Malin Åkerman) starred in during the ‘80s. When they figure out what’s going on, they realize they have to rely on their knowledge of the genre to find their way out.

One night in Berlin, a young woman from Spain meets a group of local guys while leaving a nightclub. She clicks with one of them, and so she decides to hang out with the group. Instead of being repelled when they attempt to break into a car that isn’t theirs, she’s enticed. They kick off a wild night that involves ominous drug dealers, heist, baby-theft, peril at almost every turn, and more partying. And it’s all captured in one single take.